Sorry I hurt you back!

Carlos, you hurt me. A few months have gone by since my brother passed away. Carlos was really charming. He had a look on his eyes that always made you say yes to him. He was so popular you would not believe it. Yet, he hurt me. When we were growing up he always called me names. He found reasons for rejecting me. I was never good enough in his eyes. Even my accomplishments carry some sort of negative connotation to him.

I fell for it. I was his pray. I felt fat, ugly, not nice and inadequate. Yes, all of it. I tried harder and harder to succeed and drifted farther and farther away from him. I never longed for his company though I missed having a brother.

It was not the same with the baby sister. Those 2 were close and well bonded. She was pretty, for real. She was very friendly, I really wasn't. I got so jealous of my sister that I pushed her away too. I was the typical middle child but, I decided to move on to higher places and buried myself into achieving at school. I did well and earned my parents' admiration and favor. That was not enough. I didn't have a relationship with my brother or sister. I blamed you, Carlos, for that.

I've realized that, yes, Carlos hurt me, but I've had the power to change things around all the while. I chose not to. Years down the road when I saw what a great thing could be to have a sister, I decided to pursue it no matter what. Good thing she wanted it also. it was so much easier to work through all the junk. She is my best friend! I love her to pieces!

I never got Carlos though. By the time I wanted to pursue him, God decided to take him home. Carlos, I am so sorry I hurt you back. I promise you, we will be together forever from heaven on.

I love you Manito!

Be Strong & Corageous!
No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you. Be strong and courageous... be strong and VERY courageous. Joshua 1:1-7

I've had a few conversations this week with some close and dear friends. They all had to do with BIG challenges they, we, are facing. Difficult things. Big things. I found some interestings facts in the entire situation:

• Each one of them, us, has a very special/specific calling into ministry.
• All of them, us, are trying seriously to live it out and make it happen.
• God has promised to all of us to take us through the process of reaching our maximum potential.
• The devil is not happy with either one of us.

The same way God promised Joshua that NO ONE would be able to touch him ALL the days of his life, He has promised to us, TODAY! He will be with us all and will never leave us nor forsake us. I am reminded that it might look like God is not with me, or that He forgot but, the truth is that He is with us and nothing can separate us from His love. He is true to His word because He loves us, He cares for us.

He made a promise to Joshua and later on, tells him he has a part too. Be strong and courageous, VERY courageous. Not kind of courageous, but VERY courageous. This is no business for whimpies. God knew before hand it was not going to be easy. He knew we would need this encouragement today.

Let us draw our strength from the promises He left for us in His word. And let's be courageous, conquering what is already ours. Let us not dismay until we see Him face to face.

Thank you God. Thank you for your promises and for being true.

God told me to SHUT UP!

Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation? Tell me, if you understand. Job 38:4

When we are not happy, mad I should say, we say things. These things are not good, most of the time. I caught myself being ungrateful. God gave me a beautiful day with lots of sunshine. He gave me choices of clothing to wear. He gave me breakfast, snack and lunch. He gave me a car with gas and a place to go. Yet, I was not happy.
When the attention is centered around us we miss so many things.

But like Job, I realized (after God gently wispered in my ear) that He is almighty. He knows all. And most important, He knows best!

Fine God, I am still mad. But, this time I'll say...You know best. I wasn't there when you laid the foundation of the earth, so you are right, I don't know!

Thank you for not giving up on me. Mad and all, I love You much!

All I need is YOU!



When life gets tough, all I need is You.
When the going is hard and relationships complicated;
When in the midst of a large crowd you are all alone, all I need is You.
When I've spent all my resources and I can't see beyond the tunnel;
When I am out of breath climbing my mountain and it feels like 40 years in the dessert, all I need is You.
When I hit the same wall over and over again and I choose not to move;
When tempted to wear the clown suit and take off the boxing gloves, all I need is You.
When I need to see to believe, all I need is You.
When I want to go back and forget what's ahead;
When I am tired, frustrated or scared, all I need is You.
When I don't have a plan and can not figure it out;
When I feel lost, without passion and excitement, all I need is You.


All I need is YOU!


For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you HOPE and a FUTURE.


Thank you God, for having a plan for me. Thank you for giving me a HOPE and a FUTURE. I am passionate and excited about it today!

I AM AFRAID!

This is supposed to be a spooky month...
But, the truth is that I am not afraid of the skeletons hanging on my neighbor's trees or siting on their front yards. I am afraid of the ones hiding in my closet threatening to come out.

I am a big girl now. I am not afraid of the dark. I am afraid that in my lack of faith my light might not shine bright enough.

I don't believe in big monsters. But, I am afraid if I don't stay put and close to God I might become one.

I am not afraid to open my door because something creepy and scary might come in. I am afraid that something ugly and slimy might come out.

I am not afraid of horror tales. I am afraid of the stories my mind could create and make me believe.

I am afraid God! But I know even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.